HURTING PEOPLE

"Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God." - 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

While driving home recently, I thought about the number of hurting people around me.  It is astonishing to consider the number of heartbroken people that we encounter every day.   I was reminded of a song the Lord blessed me to write a couple of years ago:

                        Open my eyes to see hurting people,

                        Those far and near who need love indeed;

                        Open my heart to have real compassion,

                        Open my hands to help those in need.

                        (Copyright Singing Time Music, a division of Gospel Heritage Music)

Quite honestly, without God's help, we tend to overlook the hurting people around us.  There are many who hide their pain behind a smile.  Many who are struggling to get through the day.

When we think of hurting people, we normally only think of those who are suffering physically.  It is true that many are struggling because of sickness.  Others are hurting because of relationship issues.  Many are hurting because of painful circumstances.  There are several Christians who are hurting because of persecution.  There are people who are in great sorrow because of the loss of a loved one.  Some are hurting because of malicious gossip and slander.  A great number of people are hurting because of unemployment and financial woes.  The list goes on and on.  Many are suffering.

What can we really do to help hurting people?  Let me briefly give you ten suggestions:

1.  PRAY FOR THEM

One thing we can do for all hurting people is to pray for them.  If you know specific incidents, specifically pray about them.  When you pray, specifically intercede on behalf of those who are struggling.

2.  DON'T CONTRIBUTE TO THE PAIN

As I've already mentioned, many are hurting because of malicious gossip and slander.  It is important for Christians to refuse to participate in gossip.  I learned long ago that there are two sides for every story.  Also I've learned that gossip is normally unreliable.  Don't contribute to the pain of others by participating in gossip.

3.  BE OBSERVANT

Pay attention to the people around you.  When you know someone well, it is easy to notice when they are not acting normal.  When you see someone acting unusually withdrawn or sad, it is a good sign that something is wrong in his or her life. 

4.  BE A FRIEND

True friends are hard to find.  Many around you need a friend.  But a friend is someone who cares all the time, not just in a crisis.  Offer hurting people a shoulder to cry on, but don't be offended if they choose not to use it.  Be willing to listen to their problems without trying to "fix" their problems.  Most people just need someone to listen to them.  You can be that person.

5.  SPEAK CAUTIOUSLY

Most hurting people don't want advice or suggestions.  Many times it is wise to withhold advice until it is asked for.  Also, don't blurt out meaningless phrases.  When we talk with people, we tend to blurt out empty phrases like, "Everything will be okay," or "I know what you're going through."  To be rather blunt, there are some situations that will not be okay.  When you say, "I know what you're going through," you're not being honest.  Even if you've been through a similar situation, you really don't know how that person feels.  Many times, hurting people simply want someone to be there for them, not someone who is offering trite words of comfort or meaningless solutions.

6.  PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES

It is important to see things from the other person's perspective.  Think carefully about the situation they are facing.  How would you want others to respond if you were going through the same situation?  Act accordingly.

7.  BE PRACTICAL

Here in the mountains of West Virginia, we are very practical when a family loses a loved one.  Neighbors and church members bring food to the grieving family.  That is a practical response to a great need.  Why can't we be practical when other situations arise?  Why can't neighbors team together to make home improvements for a widow?   Why can't we give to the poor and needy?  Why can't we give of our time for those who are lonely?  Be practical in helping the hurting.

8.  BE WISE

There are many hurting people who have no one to befriend them during their suffering, but several do.  Realize that you can't expect a perfect stranger to treat you like a friend.  You haven't earned their respect yet.  They don't know whether they can trust you or not.  Also, don't be offended if they open up to someone else.  Be available to help but realize that God may use someone else instead of you.

9.  BE MATURE

Don't reach out to others with a wrong motive.  Don't boast to others about the help you are offering.  If you fail to receive recognition or praise for your efforts, don't pout.  There are only two reasons to serve the hurting.  First, serve so that God is glorified, not you.  Secondly, serve so a need may be met --- the need of the hurting, not your selfish need for attention.

10.  TRUST & OBEY

Finally trust God and be sensitive to the Spirit's leading.  Obey the Spirit.  He will always lead you correctly.  Finally, let God do what only He can do.  Only He can mend a broken heart.  Only He can comfort those who are weeping.  Don't try to do the Lord's job.  Simply obey Him so that He may do His work through you.

Hurting people are all around us.  Don't walk selfishly through life without compassion for others. 

Perhaps if we stopped and showed compassion, some of the hurting people wouldn't hurt quite as much.